Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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