Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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