she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
