i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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