i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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