remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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