After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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