when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
