chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize