White coat. Heels.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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