know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
