WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
