haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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