My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
