just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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