I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
