he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
