I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
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