She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
