Me too!
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
