I am full of burrito and curiosity
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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