Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
