I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize