Can Purell be used as lube?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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