its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Randomize
