i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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