You work out of a Hotel?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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