my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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