He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
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