I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize