you guys were way drunker than both of me
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
