could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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