You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Randomize
