Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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