If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize