So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize