YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
