too bad you live with your parents still
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
