Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
