Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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