i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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