Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
