I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
