Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
