it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
