He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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