dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
