This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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