No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize