I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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