You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
