He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
